Day Eleven: Introduce Yourself to Someone You Know But Never Talk To (Anailuj)

At the school I go to, there is this student-run magazine called Generation. It's fantastically funny and offensive and smart and it brightens my day every time I read it.
Except now Generation is no more, because the powers that be at my school decided to get pissy with it for reasons I won't get into and suspended its charter and bylaws. They did all of this without a passing "Yo" to the editor-in-chief, Andrew.
Andrew happens to be a personal desire of mine, and every other female who read Generation and actually paid attention to who wrote what they were reading. Andrew's literary voice is (I tried a lot of adjectives in place of this word and there is no other that fits him so well) absolutely sextravagant (TM Anailuj 2009). He gives the impression of a wise-guy, a sex-fiend, a comedian, an independent voyager of the open road. If he ever reads this, I'm pretty sure it will make HIS day to know that I think of him as the Kerouac of our immodestly large university (but he'll also think I'm a creepy stalker who spends way too much time contemplating his genius. But for the record I am definitely not the only girl who feels this way about him). A sixth-year senior, he seems to have no idea what to do with his life, although in my humble opinion he could easily become the next Dave Barry. Who?

Anyway, I have a class with Andrew this semester. And today I decided to actually say something to him. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Hey. Andrew.
Andrew: [turning to me, one eyebrow raised] Yes?
Me: Is Generation ever coming back ?
Andrew: Uhhhh...I don't know. They don't tell me things. I'm not really in a position to say...[continues on with vague comments, making more eye-contact with his computer screen than with me.]
Me: That sucks.

It was a lot less glorious than I'd envisioned. I think my being a stranger and all sort of caught him off guard. But I feel way cooler about myself now that I've demystified him. This guy is sort of as much of a celebrity as you can get on a college campus with 25,000 undergraduates. And he was sort of shy.
It was adorable.

Day One

Today was warm-up day. The book gave us a list of simple activities that would only change our lives just a little bit. They included things like insult an insect, give pet names to your genitalia, and do one push up.

Anailuj decided to choose which of her toes was the prettiest. It's the one next to her pinky toe on her right foot. This toe is much more adorable than any other toe ever. Except it really isn't. This activity helped her come to terms with the fact that none of her toes are particularly attractive, though one is slightly less unattractive than the others. And that's ok. Because John's toes aren't that great either. Also she was very brave to post a picture of her foot on the internet. Hopefully there are no fetishists afoot....get it?



Yellenahs tried to say "yo" instead of "hello" today, but she failed when she answered the phone with "hello" once. This made Yellenahs realize that changing her life requires dedication. Instead she decided to tell someone her middle name. It is Nicole. The person she told said that she has a beautiful name. It was wonderful.

Anailuj and Yellenahs also stripped John of his socks in a fit of excitement and decided which of his toes is the prettiest. Most of his toes are in fact quite hideous, but the big toes were nice. Especially the right one. This activity didn't really change John's life much. He didn't actually think it was that much out of the ordinary. Though he did have some fun exploiting Anailuj's fear of feet. And almost broke Yellenahs' laptop.