Day Forty something...

Today, the book instructs me to write a proper diary entry of my day. Winston Churchill apparently did this while he was commanding a huge army in a World War. Therefore, I should also be able to do this. Let me tell you, internet following, my life is significantly more busy and stressful than Winston Churchill's.

Not really, but you can let me believe that. Thanks.

Dear Diary,

Today I woke up at least seven times to the horrible sound of my alarm clock going off. It was terrible. Although I should have gotten out of bed at 8:00 a.m., I postponed this treacherous task until 8:33. I took a shower, did my make up (the best make up ever!), put on some clothes, and trudged downstairs to get some caffeine and food into my system. For these things to occur, I had to also wash my bowl and thermos.

I finished getting ready and got into my car to go to school. Some assface who obviously doesn't have anywhere to be at ten o'clock sharp was driving slow, but I got a really good parking spot.

My first class consisted of my insane professor talking about nothing relevant for a half an hour, and then my insane professor trying to figure out how to use the DVD player. I'm not sure how he doesn't know how to work it yet, because we watch movies all the time but somehow this technology is beyond him. I understand that he's old and all but come on! He presses so many god damned buttons you'd think he would figure it out by now.

I spent my time downloading music and trying to play Farmville, but it was running pretty slow. When my professor finally let us out five minutes late, I went to the bus and crushed myself between two boys who find it necessary to spread their legs approximately 180 degrees. One of them had bad breath. I turned up my music so that I couldn't hear the retarded freshmen girls talking and looked the other way.

Luckily it's Friday so I was able to obtain a seat in Baldy Walkway pretty easily, but the douchebag who's in both of my classes today also obtained a seat near me, and I can hear him talking about stupid things and listening to terrible music.

Then I had a delicious chicken salad wrap at a delicious deli. Then I had another class and went to work for 8 hours and 45 very long minutes. There were a lot of Canadians involved but I also had a blue glittery bouncy ball for awhile and then I had a piano thing that makes meow noises but then my manager took them both away and I was le sad.

Then I came home and baked a cake for Matt Lang because his birthday was recently and it was delicious but really dangerous to light and cut while slightly tipsy, which I did. Plus the boys attacked me. Now I am writing some blog! There are people in my house! A couple left! Now I am going!

Hugs and kisses!
Yellenahs

Many Days

Alright, so I've been super lazy. Possibly the laziest. It's been at least 10 days since I've updated (but who's counting), and that was just to tell you that I'm lazy. Now that my second round of tests is over, I will probably be better. I don't have any more schoolwork to get done until December, so you've got my full attention for about 20 days. Maybe I'll even get ahead so that I won't be freaking out come December!

Wishful thinking.

Anyway, I'm not gonna go back through every day individually because that would just be really long and boring and you're not THAT interested. Well, maybe John is because he's a gimp, but that's another story. (Love you, John!)

Here are some things that you missed: Say Nothing Day (I didn't talk for much of the day because I spent a good majority of it either in class or cleaning my room excessively), Be On the Look Out for the Paranormal (as per usual), Ignore Today (well accomplished), Go to Church (not accomplished. I don't like churches that much unless they're cathedrals...in Europe), and Apply for a Knighthood (there's no way they would give it to me).

Today is Walk Barefoot on Grass day. Luckily, it's warm enough out to accomplish this. Which is also quite strange, because I happen to live in Buffalo. Where winter usually begins in the beginning of October. However, the grass is kind of wet and my toes get cold pretty easily. Bad idea.

Don't worry, after this I promise to be more consistent. I pinky-promised Rachael. With both hands.

Days Thirty-One Through Thirty-Three

Yellenahs says she's lazy, but I'm the one who's lazy. I use this blog to avoid doing things like homework. And I really need to do homework. I need to step up my game in general this semester.
Oh well.

Day Thirty-One: Nauru Awareness Day!
Today was a day for learning about the tiny Pacific island nation of Nauru. The book wants me to send them a postcard to let them know thay haven't been completey forgotten, but upon researching Nauru, I decided they're probably grateful the world has forgotten them. Formerly known as "Pleasant Island," it's really rich, has had only a small handful of tribal wars, one flu epidemic that killed a few hundred people, and a bloodless, though politically messy, squabble with Australia over gaining independence. It's had some trouble getting off it's feet since then in the government area, but honestly, only about 8000 people live there, and they're all too fat and diabetic t0 cause much trouble- over 90% of them are above the world average BMI. Which might not be saying much when you consider that that number include starving Ethiopian refugees...

...or maybe not. Yes, it certainly sucks to be Nauru, simultaneously the worlds smallest and largest island nation.


Day Thirty-Two: Tonight, Control Your Dreams
My friend the book told me that today I should focus on three objects very hard all day and see if they crop up in my dreams. The objects were a midget, an aeroplane, and a hedgehog. I thought about them all day and very intensely as I was falling asleep.
I didn't dream about them.

I wish I could dream this cute. But once I did have a dream that giant tennis shoes were licking me, and when they did, I tasted ice cream. I didn't taste like ice cream to the tennis shoes, I tasted ice cream in my mouth, even though I wasn't eating any. It was a beautiful sunny day and I'm pretty sure it was my birthday. There were balloons and I was laughing and laughing and being licked repeatedly by huge sneakers. It was the happiest feeling in the world. Best dream I ever had.


Day Thirty-Three: Be On the Lookout for the Paranormal
I'm always on the lookout for the paranormal. I believe that the truth is out there and I'm keeping my eyes wide open so I don't miss it. But today I took the job especially seriously. In the morning I was babysitting my cousins (at 6am, yeah, my life is awesome :/) and I'm pretty sure I saw a tiny child-sized demon run across their dark living room. I think it was possessing my cousins too, because they were being more evil than usual, and one threw up and another had a bloody nose (disgusting expulsion of bodily fluids is always a sign of paranormal activity).
The other weird thing about today was that people were being unusually nice. As soon as I walked into my first class, a girl I sit by said "Hey, your hair looks really good today. Like really good." Then I was in an elevator trying to get my coat on in preparation to step out into a climate that is fast beginning to resemble an arctic tundra, and I felt a hand at my back. It was a cute old man helping me with my coat.
Tiny shadow demons and an unusually active milk of human kindness? Obviously something is up. I'll call a paranormal investigator just as soon as I'm done washing that black slime off my walls. It keeps oozing out in the shape of very inhospitable words. Oxyclean should do the trick. The ghost of Billy Mays wouldn't lie to me. Would he?

How Lazy I Am

Hey guys. I know I'm behind on posts. I'll probably write them all during class tomorrow. It's not that I'm not still changing my life, I'm just soooo lazy about updating. Sorry!

Day Thirty: Ignore Today. (Anailuj)

Today is Halloween and I kind of did ignore it (although I'm pretty sure the book means to ignore today as far as these exhausting tasks go. I was actually not even going to make a post for today, but I wanted to talk about myself instead). I love Halloween to an almost unreasonable degree, but I celebrated it yesterday and did Dio de los Muertos things today. Dio de los Muertos is the Mexican Day of the Dead, and it is rad. I made quesadillas and listened to salsa music with my friend Amanda.

I would like to take this moment to place a personal ad in this blog.

Single female seeks single male with whom to dance to salsa music.
Must be capable of cooking while enjoying the exotic sounds of
Central America. No cats.

Salsa music is very near and dear to my heart for reasons I'd rather not discuss, and I feel like if there's such thing as soulmates, mine would also enjoy spontaneous salsa parties for two, and have the ability to salsa dance gracefully and skillfully, perfectly in sync with me even though we don't actually know how to salsa dance.

*Sigh*

P.S: A very happy Samhain (pronounced "SOW-in") to our pagan readers...if we have any.
P.P.S.: Sometimes girls do pretty good covers of Danzig songs.

Day Twenty-Nine: Dial a Phone Number at Random and Read This Script with a Deep Southern Accent (Anailuj)

The book gives this LONG script that's all about Jesus and how cool he is. I know I was supposed to just pick a random phone number, but I thought it would be so much more fun to call my brother instead! But I couldn't use my phone, obvs, because he would know it was me. So I used John's.
My brother answered the phone, but hung up after "You know, without God, without Jesus, we have no hope. Why? Well, because we know that the standard of God's righteousness is Law, a law of the Ten Commandments..."

So I called again. This time he did not pick up, so I left a message. Unfortunately the message time ran out by the time I got to "...having to slay a lamb for your sins would definitely keep a man on guard not to sin too much because otherwise he would lose his livestock pretty quick, wouldn't he? Well anyway, (praise be unto God)...."
So I called again and finished the script. I'm very persistant.

I concluded the fun times by showing my brother the script and asking if it sounded familiar.
"Hey," he exclaimed with an air of recognition, even revelation. "I was getting calls from this today!...Oh."
The biggest mystery for him was where in the world I was calling from. Apparently getting a call from an unfamiliar area code is the MOST CONFUSING THING IN THE WORLD.

Day Twenty-eight: Plan Your Death Row Meal (Yellenahs)

There are so many things I want to eat before I die! I want all of them! I just love food.

For an appetizer I would like taco dip with tortilla chips, and then a salad. A delicious dinner salad, like from the Olive Garden. Probably that one precisely. They have the best salad. Oh and breadsticks. I want Olive Garden salad and breadsitcks. Taco dip is kind of an entirely different region but whatever.

For dinner I would like 1.2 pounds of asparagus because it's my favorite, mashed red potatoes with the skins left on, that really delicious garlic bread that they make at the bakery at the grocery store and put in a silver bag that says "Garlic Bread," and my grandma's macaroni salad. It must be specifically the grocery store garlic bread and grandma's mac salad or IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH. For the protein I would like my mother to make me some fried chicken the special delicious way she does it with special sauce. I love special sauce. Wanna know what's in it? TOO BAD, it's a secret.

For dessert I would like some delicious chocolate, preferably milk but I really like dark, too. I would like one of grandma's cut-out cookies. Tiramisu. Mint chocolate chip ice cream. And maybe something else that I have not yet thought of. I REALLY like dessert. OH pumpkin cheesecake! Yes, that shall be my last dessert. I would like some fruit thrown in there too, because I really like fruit.

Throughout the meal I will be sippin' on apple cider, and I'll probably take a white chocolate mocha with my dessert, thank you.

Commence mission: die happy.