Day Fifteen: Be Gay for a Day! (Anailuj)

The book has an elaborate schedule of things to during the day to gradually work your way up to full-blown (If I were a guy, that pun would definitely be intended) homosexuality. I didn't have time for that.
And here's the thing: I hate girls. I mean yeah, I'm really fond of a few of them, but I didn't grow to like them over night. They proved that they aren't catty, sneaky, lying, back-stabbing bitches, and there aren't a lot of them, but I really love the ones I do have.

Here's the other thing: I am in no way opposed to appreciating female beauty. Most of the time it's in jealousy, like "Damn, I wish I had her ass," or "Maybe if I get a better bra I can have cleavage like that too." But all in all, I'm really satisfied with my body. So, on occasion, my inner lesbian rears her sexy head and delivers a wink in the direction of another female. According to Kinsey (who's research was at best debatable, but I'm trying to make a point here and I think he's right on at least this one thing), everyone's sexuality rests comewhere on a scale of 0 to 6, 0 being completely straight and 6 being totally gay. But no one is really a 0.0 or a 6.0. To put it another way, we all swing that way, just a little.

So for gay day, I contemplatd the females I might consider moving up on the scale for, and Kat Von D ranks #1, no question. She's not too skinny, I love her hair, and I'm really into the whole pin-up girl thing. Runners-up included Gwen Stefani for her kick-ass body, Bif Naked (that is what hardxcore straightxedge raw-food veganism can do for you, and Betty Page (look at all those shoes!) except for the being dead and all.

Women I would NOT consider, even with a very open mind: Angelina Jolie. I think she looks mean and her lips are rectangular. Pamela Anderson, because I prefer flesh over plastic. Megan Fox, because even the people from Transformers findsher endlessly annoying, and also because she's running the whole I'M BISEXUAL LOOK AT ME thing into the ground.

End.